im sittin here thinking to myself this morning...(again in my usual monotone) and im wondering to myself about God and his power... are our emotions free will or courtesy of Him? we pray to God for patience and strength and peace of mind and all of that stuff... but yet things happen and we can control our emotions...so which is it?... we can control when we feel lust, we go to anger management to control our tempers ...we take walks to calm down when we cry we crack jokes to laugh WEEE do all this SHIT...to control how we feel... yet at the same time shit happens and we can't help how the emotions that surface... i dont know whether to pray to whatever God that there is or to just emote... theres no answer...it cant be both ... so really wtf?
ADD...
i had a nightmare last night...i was in the shower and suddenly there was blood trickling down my legs and it crept its way across the basin of the tub before swirling into a light pink shadow as it sank down the drain... i pictured it so vividly but there was no cut..just blood leaking from the pores... this is what i get for watching CSI before bed...maybe i really am crazy... i woke up in a panic... i have no desire to die anyyyytime soon... its not 2087 yet so i have some time to go trust me... ive been having nightmares for weeks now... is this God or my subconscious tryna tell me something? whos to say they're not the same?? if there is a God... but thats another post...
ADD yet again... go figure
so i dont have anywhere to download music from... limewires been blocked on my cpu and its remotely plagued with viruses anyway and jamglue has decided to stop lettin me rip music off of famous folk for free so i need a new outlet...
quixotic thoughts and outlandish emotions... im impervious to reality
Jasmin Rose
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